According to Wikipedia, certain stimuli can cause “muscles used for physical movement are tightened and primed with oxygen” and “heart rate and heartbeat [to] increase”. To me, this all seems incredibly healthy and good for a person. Transport for London are very into the whole health thing. They try to skeeve off as much money as possible from the traffic fines to create cycle lanes and they also encourage peeps to walk a little bit. All in the name of promoting good health.

Aerobic exercise is said to be the best way to tighten and prime those customer muscles but there are other ways such as…oh….lessee…just off the top of my head let’s say….locking them all in a train and plunging them into darkness. Really gets that heart rate up I’d say. Especially if the driver doesn’t notice for a while.

So I’m driving my train and running the zoom zoom song round my head. And as luck would have it I’m just passing the bit where I was racing the freight train that other time. Not so fast tonight because my train is a pile of pants. Erratic brakes and very poor motors. Woe. Not to worry though because at least there’s a couple of things I can try in order to fix the motors. Just beside me is a whole panel of buttons n levers n things. They trip some things and set other things. Generally one wouldn’t mess around with the train while motoring but I’m outdoors, can see for miles and this is an easy fix. So I press one button to trip the motors and the other button to set them again. That simple move solves the majority of problems with the motors. Not this time though, we continued to trundle on so I shrugged and went back to humming.

It’s a funny thing about driving a train in tunnels. It’s not as dark as you might think. In the cab there are light sources from the headlights, the number box on the front, various indicator lights around the place and of course, the lights from the saloon being reflected off the tunnel walls. It creates a warm, comfy glow which is good enough to see reasonably well by. Of course, once you go outdoors you lose a lot of cab light because you don’t have the reflected saloon lights but that’s generally made up for by having streetlights and lit-up buildings near the track which compensate amply. So it wasn’t til I was driving past the park that I noticed I’d accidentally turned out all the passenger saloon lights. Er…oops.

It most likely wasn’t for very long. Not much longer than 10-15 seconds but I suppose that would feel like quite a long time if you’re back there while I’m hastily pressing the button to put em back on again. In my defence (I’ve always got one) the lights shouldn’t have gone out no matter which button I pressed over there. The fact that they did meant that the battery on the train was empty. So that’s erratic brakes, dodgy motors and no battery. Let’s just hope Metronet get sorted out soon and they start employing sufficient staff to actually run things properly!