Sometimes it’s really hard to maintain a professional demeanour when dealing with colleagues. Especially when it has been a boring day and there’s been nobody around to chat to. Still, when one of The Voices calls you out of the blue and asks for your location it really is better not to say ‘In a tunnel, deep underground’. The temptation is strong though.

Today I got a call shortly after detraining. I was about halfway to the depot where we turn the trains round when The Voice told me that one of the detrainment staff had somehow got stuck on my train while he was supposed to be tipping out. That would be a big fat PHAIL for him then. Amid much giggling on both our parts I agreed with the Voice that I’d make an uscheduled stop just before the depot and release my prisoner. Only now do I realise that he most likely didn’t have a valid ticket with him and I could have made an easy twenty quid in fines. I’m kicking myself now.

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