*raises a hand*
I have a question. Why would none of you get on my train this evening? Really, what was up with that? Was there a dead body back there? Dismembered parts? A fight? Those things can’t affect the entire train surely! I just don’t get it. Every station I came into there were loads of people on the platform and none of them got on my train. Were you waiting for better weather? A shinier train? Was it some sort of weird flashmob thing? (Note to self: That would actually make for quite a cool flashmob if loads of people went to consecutive stations and then didn’t get on any trains).
Were you worried about the quality of the driving? Look, I wasn’t even stoned by that time. And even though LUL did inadvertantly ply me with super-happy-funtime fumes through over-enthusiastically cleaning the cab with solvents it didn’t affect me that much. Mostly I just coughed a fair bit. And smiled. Really, nothing to worry about. Please, just get on my train next time – it freaks me out when you all just stand there.