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Decided that since I am working at silly hours this week I’d treat myself to a posh drink from a coffee stall. Wandered from my current line to my old line, leapt on a train and went…in the wrong direction. Was too embarrassed with myself to get off and change direction so kept going and decided to work back to my line instead and purchase an inferior posh drink at a different station. Then realised I didn’t know how to get back to my line from where I was. Standing in uniform on a busy train I pondered and eventually pulled my diary from my bag. Whilst pretending to look something up I took a sneaky peek at the tube map at the back to get directions.

As I’ve previously blogged, was repeatedly attacked by a rabid butterfly whilst driving. Additionally, arrived at work with details of my day’s work in my hot little hand. Went to find train in the depot. Wondered where details of my day’s work had gone. Wondered what my train number was. Wondered which depot exit I was scheduled to use and consequently which end of the train to sit at. Muddled through and arrived in a platform. Wondered where I was going. Continued to wonder throughout the day.

Goddamn it, I want that posh drink. Returned to old line and ensured I went in the right direction. Leapt out and purchased delicious drink. Success! Returned to own line having previously checked the route to ensure no further getting lost. More success! Got to work and entered the cab of my train. Dropped drink.

Gapped train. This involves neatly placing the train over a very specific spot in the track so as to prevent any current being drawn and rendering the train unable to move. This is a hugely embarrassing move and has the capacity to shut several lines at once. Generally results in much pointing and laughing by the other drivers and there’s no point complaining to management that you’re being bullied for being retarded. Managed to sort myself out using unorthodox method (I’ll never tell!).

Dreading it…